Barney Reloaded

I just made a wonderful discovery: a series of movies made by The White House from the perspective of Barney, one of Mr. President's Scottish Terriers. Briefly obsessed, I made it through the entire series.

My favorite by far is Barney Reloaded. In this caper, Barney is charged with a job to do, and oh, boy, does he do it! You would not believe the hi jinks our favorite canine pulls, but in the end, he is the boss!!

The only way to access these excellent films is through the kids' section of whitehouse.gov, which unfortunately has caused the entire oeuvre to exist in relative obscurity. In an effort to allow these movies to reach a broader audience, here is the link:

http://www.whitehouse.gov/barney/barney-bio.html

These movies are also the closest we may get to a reality show about life in The White House (unless, perhaps, finger-on-the-pulse Obama and the soon-to-be First Mom would like to change that, please), so for that reason alone, they are culturally relevant and required watching.

Dairy Diary

My loss is your gain!

I ate 2-goblets worth of chocolate pudding in a hurry today, only to find myself, 30 minutes later, shuttling back and forth between the bathroom and my office for the next 2 hours in a cold sweat. At times, I was in the stall so long that the motion-sensor lights shut off, forgetting all about the presence of my sentient being. I haven't jacked my system up like that in a while.

I must admit--at first, I thought it might have been that old mushy salmon I ate for lunch. What was I thinking?! It was so obviously the chocolate pudding. And so arrives the debut of . . .

Dairy Diary: Triggers for Toilet Time in the Dark

Entry 1: loads of chocolate pudding eaten quickly in one sitting.

And just because I want to add a "homeless" tag to this entry, I pose the following rumination: what do homeless people do when they get diarrhea? Surely they get sick all of the time eating food out of the garbage. Is the sidewalk the answer? Aside: Now that I'm a dog-owner, I realize how easily a plastic bag can turn into a portable toilet. If/when I am homeless, I plan to excrete my solid waste into plastic bags.